I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Randomize