The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize