Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?