I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
