Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Do vagina's smell?
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
