Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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