SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
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