If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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