are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
