I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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