don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually