I'm lost and stupid without you.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're like a gay fantastic four
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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