Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(301): View more from Maryland

Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.

(1-301): View more from Maryland

I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.

Fav 39 3549 992
share tweet
(978): View more from Massachusetts

it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny

Fav 17 973 2787
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(325): View more from Texas

I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room

Fav 53 4784 2733
share tweet
(608): View more from Wisconsin

so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"

Fav 37 10214 2533
share tweet
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(608): View more from Wisconsin

I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on

Fav 24 4987 902
share tweet
(626): View more from California

yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably

Fav 9 803 2343
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(217): View more from Illinois

Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL

Fav 7 1707 778
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(210): View more from Texas

Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"

Fav 1 492 304
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(816): View more from Missouri

I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.

Fav 1 28 39
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT