Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
