Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
