So drunk, too bad you don't want this
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society