hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
