oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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