She is in my trunk
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...