So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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