i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
