A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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