He had one of those small greek statue penises
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
