Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Randomize