PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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