the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
