new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
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