Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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