he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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