It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
cat food counts as protein by the way
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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