turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Randomize
