i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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