How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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