Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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