i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
