just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Randomize
