I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize