Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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