What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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