your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Randomize
