do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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