This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
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Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
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No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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