After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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