Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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