So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
