Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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