belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
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