fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
