Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
He felt like a one man threesome
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And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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