i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
