Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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